Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Friends

I'm tired of trying. I'm tired of trying to be friends with everyone, please everyone, make sure everyone is happy, taken care of, etc etc etc. I just get hurt. The level of hurt I feel and have dealt with in the last 2 years is at an all time high. I would be quite content to just keep the acquaintances I have, the close friends I have now, and my family near and that's all. I'm tired of meeting people, being vulnerable enough to share with them and trust them....only to betrayed and hurt.
so right now I'm done being the friend. I'm done being the one who makes sure everyone is happy. I am just me, Nick's wife, Tracy and Lisa's daughter and Staci's sister. If you are my friend and we're close, I treasure you. If you've been hurt by me, I'm desperately sorry and if you've hurt me, I'm trying to forgive you. If you do not belong in one of those categories, I'll try to open up some. For now, I just want to be...

1 comment:

Mandy said...

Hey girl. I'm sorry you've been dealing with so much drama this year. And I'm sorry if I was at all a part of it. I know I've been pretty flaky lately and I miss you! I feel so bad that we lost touch over the last few months and that I've said things online in the past that have offended you. This year I've been trying to discover where I belong and what kind of person I'm supposed to become, so I feel like I've been hopping around everywhere, doing my own thing, and just experimenting with what I like and what kinda things I wanna do with my life. I have to say that you kinda helped me break out of my shell some this year and that you've gotten me out of the house when I really needed to break free. I really look up to you and enjoy talking to you and I hope we can hang out and talk more in the future! Thanks for everything you've done for me! You don't know how much it's meant to me! Love ya! - Mandy